Letters from a Bipolar Mother Review and Guest Post

In "Letters From A Bipolar Mother", Alyssa Reyans tells the story she's never been able to tell her children: of how she lost them in a battle with her own mental illness. she shares with them - and the world - what the mind of a woman suffering bipolar depression looks like, how the darkness she battled on a daily basis almost won, and how, years later, she found the courage to claw her way out of the abyss. Covering a span of five years, Alyssa Reyans shares both her pain and strength in a struggle against an incurable illness that many women today also share.
ebook, 86 pages
Published February 18th 2012 by Alyreyans Press

 

Now before you run away thinking, "Why on earth would I want to read a book like that?" I am going to tell you, because it has an important message.  I thought the same thing when I was approached by a fellow blogger and asked to host Alyssa.  She told me this was a difficult book and that I didn't have to read it, but curiousity won and I read the whole thing in about an hour.  Yes, this is a difficult topic, but if you know anyone, friend or family member that battles with depression, then you will want to check this out.  If you now someone caught in the dark struggle of bipolar disorder, at the very least refer them to Alyssa's site.  As a sufferer she can impart some wisdom to someone finding their way in the dark.  Now here is my review:

Four Stars: A book that tackles a tough, misunderstood topic.

I admit, I was hesitant to read this book because, well let's face it, reading books with weighty subject matter can often be difficult.  I wasn't going to read this one, but then my inner psychologist was itching to take a peek.  I ended up reading it in one sitting.  This book is an emotional roller coaster.  Alyssa takes you through the highs and lows of  living with bipolar disorder.  No, it isn't pleasant and it is hard to understand what a person suffering from depression goes through, but Alyssa manages to take your hand and lead you into the belly of the beast.  Her life is full of heartbreak and tragedy.  Starting at a young age when she was molested by her own father.  At a time when abuse and depression were just beginning to come to light. Unfortunately, she lived through it when it was still okay to sweep it under the rug and ignore it.  Consequently, Alyssa was forced to deal with the fall out of the abuse on top of battling an illness she didn't know she had.  Two suicide attempts later and she is still reeling, trying to secure her footing.  Then as a teenager she finds herself as the mother of two young children, trying to be a good mother while doing her best to keep her world from spiraling out of control.  Little did she know that soon she would make the decision to leave her children with their father for a short time, never realizing it would be the last time she saw them.  Now years later, Alyssa properly diagnosed, has finally come to terms with her illness.  She accepts responsibility for her actions and avoids placing blame on her mental illness.  A truly courageous and remarkable step. She continually fights a daily battle, like anyone who suffers from depression can tell you, there are good days and bad.  It is a constant struggle to keep the beast at bay.  Separated by time and distance across an ocean of misunderstanding, Alyssa wrote this novella to reach out to her children and let them know that despite the painful past she has always loved them and always will.  Not knowing if her words will ever reach them, she hopes that in sharing her story she can climb a little further out of the belly of the beast, known as depression.  Hopefully, by sharing her story she can help others struggling with this debilitating illness.  If you suffer from, or know someone with depression, then you will understand how this beast ravages and destroys families.  I hope that her words will help others and that there will be continued strides made toward curing and spreading awareness on depression.  Alyssa is braver than she gives herself credit.  I truly wish her continued success in her valiant fight. I pray that her words will find her children.  Good luck Alyssa, thanks for being courageous enough to share your story.

Favorite Quotations:

"If for one second, you release control or look away, the monster takes control of your life, and it could be days, weeks, months or even years, before you realize you have fallen back into the abyss and once again have to dig your way out."

"I want you to know if this illness ever touches your life, there is someone who understands."

"Except you cannot outrun insanity, anymore than you can outrun your own shadow."

"My sanity succumbed to the internal chaos, and I floated through life.  I was a mere passenger in the shell of my body.  I did not control it.  It controlled me."

Now some words from the author Alyssa Reyes:

Thanks to Heidi for having me here today. It’s still weird to see myself counted amongst “writers”. Yes I am self publishing my memoir, but when I look around at all of the talented authors out there, it’s hard to apply that label to myself.  I call myself a word doodler instead. I think that seems more appropriate. I doodle words upon the page. By being a word doodler I don’t feel the heavy burden of having to carry around the title of “writer”. It allows me to continue jotting down my story, which is not always an easy thing to do. Writing is difficult. Doodling is easy. Maybe it’s a trick of the mind or a play on words, but it helps me to always push through those moments when the words seem to have dried up. During those moments I just keep doodling and eventually the whole picture becomes clear. The words take on a life of their own and I just join them for the ride. Allowing them to take me wherever they want to go. Not forcing or trying, just doodling. I use to think someday I might be a writer, but for now I’m having too much fun doodling. I think I may just remain a word doodler. There’s less pressure and more chocolate. And really who wouldn’t want a job that involves chocolate?

I’m also having a giveaway. There will be 3 ecopies of my book, Letters from A Bipolar Mother, given away. You can enter via rafflecopter. The giveaway will end on 23rd and you can enter here through Heidi’s blog or at my website.  Also if you’d like to join my mailing list, all members who join prior to the launch of the second book in the series, Chronicles of A Fractured Life, will automatically receive a free ecopy of Book Two. 

Thanks Alyssa for sharing your story! Alyssa is offering copies of her book if you wish to enter here is the link. 

Comments

[Maja]

I'll go enter the giveaway now because this totally sounds like something I want to read. My favorite book about depression has to be The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, maybe because I know that she lost the battle in the end.

Anyway, thanks for the lovely review, Heidi. :)

[Jenny]

Sounds like an intense book about a topic I honestly don't know all that much about, but would really like to understand a bit better. I like that she calls what she does "doodling", that definitely sounds less intimidating than writing:) I think maybe I could be a doodler, but maybe not so much a writer. Thanks for this post!

[Alyssa]

Thanks Heidi for the kind review and having me here today.

@Maja, I loved The Bell Jar too. I don't think my story goes anywhere near that level, but everyone's experience is different I guess and just as intense when you're in the middle of the storm.

@Jenny, yes doodling is way easier. I write because life gave me a story to tell not so much because I'm a storyteller.

[Sam]

You have convinced me with your review Heidi that this is worth a try - you had me at the first line actually. That's probably exactly what I would think about a book with such a difficult and personal topic and I'm glad you explained you were hesitant to read this at first, too. MY curiosity is definitely winning over. Great post!

[Carly @Fiction Fascination]

This is something very close to my heart. I am definitely going to check this out, great review Heidi, I'm glad curiosity won out.:) Great post Alyssa, I am heading over to your giveaway now. -Carly :)

[rainydayramblings]

@Maja I am going to look into Bell Jar. Thanks for telling me about it, I hope you do check this one out, yes it is a difficult topic but it is fascinating and informative.
@Jenny thanks for stopping by and reading the post, yes it is a very misunderstood illness.
@Sam I knew putting this on the blog a lot of readers would look and click away because they don't want to read a book on a tough topic, thanks for reading the post today :)
@Carly, obviously you know someone who suffers from depression as do I and you know how devastaing it is. Thanks for your support!

[rainydayramblings]

@Alyssa, Happy to help you get the word out!

[Missie, The Unread Reader]

Wow, yes, highly misunderstood topic. But it seems like the memoir offers a honest look, and that's important in helping to inform and educate people.

P.S. I think word doodler is a much more impressive title than writer. :)

[kindlemom1]

Thanks for the honest review Heidi! I would be curious to read this one as well.
I took a few psychology classes in my time and this sounds like something that would be really interesting to read.

[Mimi Valentine]

WOW!! What an eye-catching title! Ohhhh, Heidi, I agree with you completely! Sometimes books that tackle serious topics like this one are so hard to read that I don't usually try to pick them up.

If I ever saw this one on my own, I probably never would've picked it up but your review has me really wanting to! The way you describe Alyssa's courageousness, her huge heart... This line, especially, really got to me: "It is a constant struggle to keep the beast at bay." I couldn't even imagine it! Just WOW.

Absolutely beautiful review, Heidi!! Definitely worthy of this beautiful-sounding book! :) Thanks so much for sharing! <3

[VeganYANerds]

I think reading about difficult topics can be great, they challenge us more than typical YA books do.

[Readventurer BookBlog]

I think this sounds like a really tough read but interesting as well. I know a few people with bipolar and it is sometimes hard to see what they have to deal with--though maybe I've just known some people who experiment a lot with their meds. The author is very courageous to write a memoir and I'm sure it will be meaningful to tons of readers. Great review, Heidi.

-Flann

[rainydayramblings]

@Ali my B.S. is in psychology so I had to read this one. Very interesting. Give it a chance.
@Mimi this is definitely one that I thought a lot of people would pass up reading my review on the blog because of the topic, thanks for reading it. Alyssa does share some heart wrenching details but she is a survivor and my heart goes out to her.
@Mands yes this book was a challenge but I am so glad I read it. I hope others will give it a chance.
@Flann, then you know how horrible depression is not only for the sufferer but for everyone around them. I hope more people will help spread the message. Thanks!

[Rachel Bigger]

Great review Heidi on such a tough subject. The author is a brave woman indeed to share her heartbreaking struggles. Thanks for shinning a light on this disorder. :)

[rainydayramblings]

@Rachel, indeed she is.,Thanks for stopping by! You are wonderful!

[Candace]

I agree that reading books with such weighty topics can be difficult but it's important so we can understand people and what they go through better. I've known people who were bipolar and it's definitely got to be a struggle to live with it. Kudos to you Heidi for reading it and to the author for taking the time to write about it and share her experience.

[rainydayramblings]

@ Thanks Candace. It is a topic that is important to me. Alyssa is indeed brave to share her story. Thanks for reading the post and commenting!

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